What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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