What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?

Snow balls!
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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How many fatalists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What does it matter? we're all gonna die anyway.
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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