What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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What do sea monsters eat for lunch?

Fish and ships.
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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