What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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