What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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