What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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