What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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