What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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