What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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