What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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