What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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