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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?
One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?
The leaning tower of Pizza.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?
Because there was no atmosphere.
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What country makes you shiver?
Chile.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?
Sherlock Bones.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?
Roberto.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?
Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?
H2O cubed.
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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?
To see how long he slept.
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How do you make Halloween great again?
By carving a Trumpkin.
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