What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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Why was the boy sitting on his watch?

Because he wanted to be on time.
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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