What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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