What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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