What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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