What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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