What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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