What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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