What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Astronomers prefer the dark.
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