What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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