What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies

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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."

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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.

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What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.

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