What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?

Snow balls!
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What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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