What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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