What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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