What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Why is b always cool?

Because it's between ac.
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