What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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