What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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How do you know when its Michael Jacksons bed time ?

When the big hand touches the little hand
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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