What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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