What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.

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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."

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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!

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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals

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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.

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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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