What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!

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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)

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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.

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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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