What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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