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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?
If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?
Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Why did the cow cross the road?
Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What do you call a messy hippo?
A hippopota-mess
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?
He took them to a pignic.
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What did one volcano say to the other?
I lava you.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?
Cats keep trying to bury them.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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