What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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