What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've got you covered!
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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