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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?
If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?
Buy a deck of cards.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?
A crookodile
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."
"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?
Plug its nose.
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Why do fish live in salt water?
Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?
After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?
Because there are too many ears.
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