What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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