Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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