Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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