Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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