Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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