Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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What do you call a chicken in the 1960's?

A funky chicken.
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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