What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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