What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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