What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.

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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!

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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish

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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!

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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!

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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.

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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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