What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?

Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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