What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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