What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Why did the cucumber call 911?

It was in a pickle!
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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