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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?
Sherlock Bones.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".
I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
One molar solution.
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Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the "r" sound?
Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?
Stuck
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?
he got a little behind in his work.
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?
H2O.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?
Thorium.
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