What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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