What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Astronomers prefer the dark.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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