What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.

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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.

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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.

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Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.

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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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