What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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