What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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My pastor, he ate too many beans.

He had in his own pews.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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