What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Astronomers prefer the dark.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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