What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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