What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?

A robber ducky.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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Who's richer — the butcher, the baker, or the candlestick maker?

The baker, because he has lots of dough.
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