What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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