What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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