What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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