What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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