What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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