What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.

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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .

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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.

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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.

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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle

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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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