What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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