When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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