When can't you see a cheese?

When it's pasteurised...
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.

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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.

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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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