When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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I went down the local supermarket, I said, "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it",

he said, "Those are pickled onions".

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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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Why did the man take a pencil to bed?

Because he wanted to draw the curtains!
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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