When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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