When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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