When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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