When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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