When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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