When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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