When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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