When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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