When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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