When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?

Taller
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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