When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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