When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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