When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.

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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.

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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.

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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!

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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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