When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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