When is a door not a door?

When it's ajar!
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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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