When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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