When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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