When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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Why was the boy sitting on his watch?

Because he wanted to be on time.
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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How many [ethnic] gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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