When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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