When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.

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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.

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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck

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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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