When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
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