When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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