When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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