When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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