When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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