When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.
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Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?

He was caught stealing second base.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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