Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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