Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
Canvas not available.

or


How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
Canvas not available.

or


How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
Canvas not available.

or


El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
Canvas not available.

or


How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
Canvas not available.

or


Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
Canvas not available.

or


I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
Canvas not available.

or






© Copyright crapjoke.com 2017-2026