Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What do you call a chicken in the 1960's?

A funky chicken.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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