Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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