Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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