Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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