Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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