Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"

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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine

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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut

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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.

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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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