Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.

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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.

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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic

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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.

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