Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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