Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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