Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is happy when the case is closed

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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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