Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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