Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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