Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?

To practice.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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