Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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