Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.
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