Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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