Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.

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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.

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Why do some people have an instant aversion to banjo players?

It saves time in the long run.

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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.

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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.

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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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