Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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