Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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