Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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