Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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What letter can you drink?

T (tea)
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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