Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
Canvas not available.

or


What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
Canvas not available.

or


Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
Canvas not available.

or


My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
Canvas not available.

or


How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
Canvas not available.

or


How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
Canvas not available.

or


Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
Canvas not available.

or


How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
Canvas not available.

or


How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
Canvas not available.

or


How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
Canvas not available.

or






© Copyright crapjoke.com 2017-2026