Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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