Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What do you call the king of vegetables?

Elvis Parsley.
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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