Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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