Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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What makes music on your hair?

A head band!

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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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