Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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