Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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Why was the boy sitting on his watch?

Because he wanted to be on time.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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