Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?

To practice.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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