Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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