Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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