Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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