Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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