Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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