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Where do all the letters sleep?
In the alphabed.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.
But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?
"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?
A rash of good luck.
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?
Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?
Porkchop
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."
The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."
The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?
Roosters don't lay eggs!
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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?
She wanted to see a butterfly.
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