Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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