Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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