Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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