Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.

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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.

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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).


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I tried water polo but my horse drowned.



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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!

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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.

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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.

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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.

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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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