Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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