Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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Who's richer — the butcher, the baker, or the candlestick maker?

The baker, because he has lots of dough.
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