Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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