Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the "r" sound?

Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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