Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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