Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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