Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How many fatalists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What does it matter? we're all gonna die anyway.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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