Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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