Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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