Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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