Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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How many [ethnic] gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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