Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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How much does a hipster weigh?

An instagram.
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How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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