Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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