Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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