Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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