Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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