Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What letter can you drink?

T (tea)
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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