Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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What do you call the king of vegetables?

Elvis Parsley.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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