Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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A seal walks into a club...
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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