Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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