Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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