Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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