Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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