Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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