Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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A seal walks into a club...
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Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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