Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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