Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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PMS jokes are not funny...

[Period]
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