Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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