Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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