Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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