Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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