Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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