Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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