Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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