Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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