Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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