Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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