Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.

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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.

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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!

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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).

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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.

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