Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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