Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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