Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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