Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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