Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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