Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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