Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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