Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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