Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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