Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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