Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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