Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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