Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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