Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What are pirate's favoite treat?

Chips AHOY!!
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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