Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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