Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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