Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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