Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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