Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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