Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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