Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!

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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!

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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!

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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.

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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.

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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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