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Where do you go to find a million story building?
You go to the Library!
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?
Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?
A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four
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What did one ion say to the other?
I've got my ion you.
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Why are babies good at soccer?
Because they dribble!
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?
She stole his heart.
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?
Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"
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Why don't bears wear shoes?
What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the "r" sound?
Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
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