Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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