Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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