Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me

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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.

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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.

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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.

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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.

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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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