Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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