Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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