Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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