Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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