Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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