Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.

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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean

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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.

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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).

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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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