Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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Why did the tree go to the dentist?

It needed a root canal.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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