Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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