Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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