Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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