Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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