Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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