Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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