Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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