Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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What kind of driver has no arms or legs?

A screwdriver.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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