Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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