Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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