Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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