Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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