Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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