Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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