Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.

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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops

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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.

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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.

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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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