Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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