Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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