Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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