Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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