Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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