Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?

A robber ducky.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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